Category: Writing
Happy April Fish Day

As the youngest of three siblings, the arrival of April Fools’ day was never exactly a reason to celebrate. As a kid, I recall awakening — breathless, disoriented, in a cold sweat — to the sight of my sister bleeding-out on my bedroom floor, a butcher knife jutting out from her armpit. (Yes, that happened.) My brother, not interested in […]

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Your Phone Is Ruining You For Us

I find it impossible to write fiction that’s set after 2002. Not because I’m a Gen-Xer waxing nostalgic about relaxing to Morcheeba on a distastefully stained sofa I found partially torn apart by a dog in an alley. (Oh, the glamour.) It’s just that it’s inconceivable to depict contemporary times authentically without including interludes where characters stare at their cell […]

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The Times printed a 1000 word smear piece on de Blasio accusing him of being a thoughtful leader who listens to people

Given the Times‘ disappointing endorsement of Christine “no specific plan to require the richest New Yorkers to pay more in taxes” Quinn for mayor, this odd piece on de Blasio is hardly surprising. It’s central premise suggests that the mayor of New York can only govern adequately by being a narcissistic prick, like Bloomberg or Giuliani. The Times sums up […]

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Seven Great Under-the-Radar Christmas Albums

It’s that time of the year again when new indie renditions of syrupy holiday songs are shared by music snobs who wouldn’t touch Harry Connick’s Auld Lang Syne with Michael Bublé’s Mele Kalikimaka. There are definitely some strong releases to be discovered including Sufjan Stevens’ latest holiday collection, Silver and Gold, though, admittedly, you’ll feel so twee listening to it […]

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Coming Next Year: Summer 2013 Movie Preview

Via The Morning News With blockbusters like Snow White and the Huntsman, Zombie Overkill, and Yahtzee: Alien Invasion, it’s already a smash hit for summer movies. But serious film buffs know Summer 2012 will be even better—and we’re not just talking about Jerry Bruckheimer’s live-action Hungry Hungry Hippo Apocalypse. Justice League Avengers: Manchild Uprising DC and Marvel Comics unite for […]

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The Frothiest, Most Excrement-Filled Rick Santorum Quotes

A new one by yours truly over at HuffPost: I’m as happy as the next person to see the underused adjective, frothy, have a resurgence. Too bad it’s due to Rick Santorum’s strong showing in Tuesday’s Iowa straw poll. Before he fizzles, here’s a stroll down memory lane revisiting some of the frothiest excrement that’s passed through his lips. On […]

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First Follows: Weird Choices in First Twitter Follows!

A new one by yours truly over at The Awl.

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The Lowest Rated Movies in the Netflix Categories I’m Least Likely to Watch

Because we’re all addicted to Netflix. A new piece by yours truly over at The Awl: CATEGORY: Goofy + Buddies & Gal Pals FILM: Sex Pot YEAR: 2009 NETFLIX SUMMARY: “[A] raunchy comedy about two wannabe Don Juans who have no luck with the ladies. That is, until the pair happens upon a stash of pot that the honeys find […]

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Congress Divided Across Party Lines Over Who Is Displaying More Unity

A new one by yours truly over at The Huffington Post: Republican Congressman Joe Wilson agrees that the Democratic initiative of mixed seating isn’t enough. He says that in light of the tragedy in Tucson, lawmakers need to diffuse their divisive rhetoric. “Instead of shouting ‘you lie’ when the president addresses Obamacare,” said Wilson, “I will yell out something more […]

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New York Sports Bars for the Sports-Averse

It’s playoff season. If you hate sports as much as I do, but hate missing out on the gluttony, I’ve got a new piece for you on The Awl: With the NFL playoffs underway, multitudes of jock-averse women and effeminate, girlie men (like me) find themselves facing a challenging predicament over the next couple of weeks. On one hand, forgoing […]

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